Saturday, March 05, 2011

30 Questions...just to name a few!

Do we stay in Christchurch or do we go somewhere else?

If we stay, do we keep living where we are or do we get our own place? Where will Tahu work? Will I be able to work from home or will I have to go back to an office? Will the aftershocks stop? Will there be no more big ones? Will we be safe? Will we ever feel safe? Will I ever stop worrying about what could happen whenever I’m not with my family or friends?

If we go, where do we go? Do we stay in New Zealand or go overseas? Melbourne? Sydney? Auckland? Brisbane or Gold Coast? Perth? Not Timaru or Wellington that’s for sure! Wellington is nice but I’m not leaving one lot of earthquakes for a city which has them regularly! Will Tahu be able to get work? Where would we live? Would we go there permanently or just for a few months? Would we flat with other people? Move in with family? Get our own place? And what do we do with all our stuff? We have 2 cars and a house load of furniture, almost 30 years of memories each and 6 months of fear to deal with.

And what about our plans, will we still be able to save for the wedding in Rarotonga that Tahu is a best man for? Our wedding? Our honeymoon? We will have so many more costs if we move. Will we be able to travel and be able to not worry about everyone back in Christchurch?

What about each of our experiences of that day? For those of us in Christchurch that felt it and saw it first hand or for those out of town who have to comfort us from afar? When do we start processing all of this? It feels too soon, too raw to start just yet.

And while all of this goes through our minds over and over and over again there is still that thought in the back of my mind that says “what are you complaining about! You survived! Your family survived! Your friends survived! Your house is still in one piece!”

30 Questions…just to name a few!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh Jo it's all too hard I know but take each day as it comes. You will both make whatever decisions need to be made & they will be right for you. We all have own stories & need to work through them in time. Be kind to yourself & don't put too much pressure or expectations on yourself. Use others as sounding boards & keep talking. You will come through this stronger than you think. Love & special Wishes Leanne xxoo

Jo said...

Leanne you are so kind. And what you say is right. I feel very much like we have to get ourselves together and make plans right now but actually we can't and there isn't any rush. Let's hope things get better soon though xx

Anonymous said...

Wherever you choose please dont go somewhere where you are the only family. It is very understandable that you are considering this along with many others too I am sure.

Meantime everyone who has been through it have their emotions very close to the surface so it does feel raw. We cope where we must but an ounce of kindness and we are deeply touched.The tears quickly surface.

This is processing already. Be kind to yourself, avoid extra stress, spend time with those who love you, both family and friends keeping in mind that their emotions are also shredded.

Together we will survive this!
Mum xx