The debate continues

So the drugs debate appears to have started again on the Andrews's blogs.

Recently I was discussing this with Paul and I realised something that lots of people say when debating drug use being made legal and it's completely irrelevant. "Alcohol is a drug". But a completely different one to pot so what's the point of bringing that up in an arguement? They're different because they're used differently and because they are different things. If we all had alcohol as often and in the same amount as one might have pot then there would never be an issue with drink driving or anything else. Or if we used pot as often as we used alcohol then there's no way it should be made legal. They're completely different and to compare them is useless. They're used differently and in different quantities.

It's like comparing eggs and radishes. They're different! Both foods but if you put radishes in a cake mix instead of eggs you'd have something very strange and if you ate eggs as often as we eat radishes we'd miss out on vitamins and stuff that are important.

So using alcohol being a drug as a reason to make pot legal pointless.

Long time no see

It's about time I wrote. It feels like not that long cos I wrote a post but when I clicked publish the internet at tec threw a tantrum and didn't work. Here is my second attempt:

Pauls friend Cooper was up recently and we watched on TV about something called the Mandraught. It's something about how there's more women then men in their 30s in NZ or something. So Cooper comes up with Pickup-Line-Of-The-Year: "It's a Mandraught! I'm the best your gonna get!". Hahahahaha...am I the only one laughing? Well I wasn't when he said it!

Some how I have managed to make my last post only 4 lines. It was longer last time! News of the week is that I have Glandular Fever. Upside being I get to eat strawberries and I got a phonecall from my big bro. Downside being there's nothing tec can do to help me so I will have to complete my year just like everyone else but hoping I don't get any more sick then I am!

On Friday night I went to my nieces end of year awards thingy for Girls Brigade. She won the Opawa Baptist Cup for most Church attendance, Deb got flowers for helping with one of the certificates in sewing or something and I got chocolates for choreographing the dance they performed. And Deb presented the James Brown Insurances Cup. Some how we managed to all get something which was nice!

Better go, works almost finished. Ciao!

I dedicate this one to my Mum!

Ah the contriversy that is my blog! Didn't mean to start WW3 with my Howard Morrison comment request but never mind!

And mum: I am very sorry for my last post. I will not steal your jokes anymore. I much appreciate you emailing them to me. For all those confused readers: the pope joke was sent to me from mum.

My exam went fine, managed to get through it, 90% sure I passed because I got the program to work! And the upside is a pass is only 70% in this exam rather than the normal 80%. Trust me that 10% feels like a whole lot!! The exam after it was horrible and I refuse to talk about it until I get results.

Can't be bothered writing anything else. Ciao!

Hahahaha

Year 1981
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes
4. Pope Died

Year 2005
1. Prince Charles got married (again)
2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe (again)
3. Australia lost the Ashes (again)
4. Pope Died (What the!)

In future, if Prince Charles decides to re-marry and Liverpool wins another European crown and Australia loses the ashes......please warn the Pope!

18 minutes to go

In 18 minutes I have a programming exam. I am a little nervous about it but also not in the fact that I can get most of it to work and I can't worry about it till I can actually see the programs I have to write as part of the exam. (If anyone is actually interested it is the C language I am learning in this class)

I feel odd. I have done so many good things in the last few days but I still feel like I haven't done enough. Saturday I spent time with my sister and her family which was so good. Just can't get enough time to spend with them but I am working on it!! Yesterday I went to Mum's BBQ and did 4 loads of washing and got it all dry on the line for free (we usually go to the laundrymat to dry our washing, much faster you see). Well not all of it, 2 of Pauls tshirts weren't quite dry but close enough! Also I finally got stuff from Mum and Dads I had been meaning to get for ages, we got groceries, I spent time with Ary (down from Wellington and managed to find me!) and studied for the exam. Today I did most of a graphics assignment and did more study for 1pm exam (will study for 3pm exam resit when it comes) and I have even managed to write a post for my blog. But yet I just want a day off to do more stuff. Fix my room, do more cooking/baking, finish assignments, earn money, pay bills, the list goes on. (13 mins to go).

I better go do more study. Anyone care to comment on Howard Morrison vs Rosita?

Crazy Lady

(I'm not sure if the title is relating to me or the lady on Campbell Live last night.)

So this lady writes into Campbell Live saying about how NZ gave $2million to America but only $750,000 to Pakistan. "Wake up and smell the racism" she says. Now I can see why she's getting upset. It's much easier and more interesting to go "oh that's racist" then go "glad we're giving such large amounts of money!" than to think about why the government would do that when we're all gonna know about it. So the obvious thing is to look at the exchange rates isn't it?? According to Westpacs Currency Calculator at the moment:

NZ$2million = US$1,382,800
NZ$750,000 = Pakistan Rupee30,565,875.

Yes that's right, over 30 million of their "dollars". Not so stingy now is it! Get a life lady!! be happy that we're actually giving money and not just sitting there going "oh that's sad".

Moving right along, I had a random and very clear dream last night. Andrew and Mark Wilson were there, it was Jeffs birthday but I don't know where he was. Anyways the main thing I remember was that Dave Bates had had a baby but not with Adelle but he was still marrying Adelle and she had physically had the baby (that's confusing I know, dreams!!!). So we were at the party and I went and talked to Adelle who was holding the baby (girl but don't know name) and the baby wanted to come to me so I held her and all I remember is holding her for the whole party and she just slept in my arms and wanted to be with me. Random eh. And I know completely uninteresting to everyone but thought it was funny that I dreamt about all those people from youthgroup. Oh and at the end when I gave the wee girl back to Adelle I was like you are doing an amazing job raising her, she will be perfect, hard to explain, I just knew she was going to raise the girl amazingly. Random!

Enough, I have to study, I have a large programming exam on Monday.
Better go study, got a large programming exam on Monday

Finally!!

At last I have time to actually blog. It's been holidays and I have been wanting term to start again just so I have some time off!! I worked both weeks which, in hindsight, was not a good idea. But I did however get Friday off. And so I took Paul out on a surprise. Friday afternoons we both have off so we try to do something interesting instead of cleaning the house or whatever.

So this Friday I took him to Orana Park for lunch and just looking at animals. We left our house about 11.30am and I drove us out there and made him close his eyes for most of the trip however I did forget about the last sign on the way so he saw where we were going about a km before we got there. We had an awesome lunch in one of the picnic areas with ducklings, ducks and peacocks (and some small children) watching our every move. After that we went on the shuttle around the park and then went to the Lion enclosure. We had got tickets to go on the lion feeding which was the best part. We got to go on the back of the truck as they went into the enclosure and fed them. We got awesome photos and it was amazing to see the lions close up cos they are so big and beautiful! After that we went and got an icecream then saw the Rhinos being fed and then the Cheetah cubs being run.

It's hard to write how good the day was. It had been meant to rain but it stayed beautiful and sunny until we got home and Orana Park is such a cool place to go. It was so nice to just walk around and see the animals we won't see naturally in New Zealand. We ended up spending about 4 hours there. I feel very much like I'm writing for primary school about a class trip but it was so much fun it just had to be talked about. Was worth losing a day of work for! I will try and put some pictures up later when I'm at home.

I think that's about it. Holidays are over now...so good to be back in routine! I know that's not how it should be but working with kids for 2 weeks is very tiring and so far removed from normal work. Don't ever let anyone say being a mum is easier than working in a job!!!! Give me an office job any day over holiday programs!!

Denise and Denephews

I'm gutted cos someone recently did the Denise and Denephew joke on their blog and now I can't find it. It was very funny. If anyone doesn't know it, comment, and I'll write it as best I can remember it.

And it's not really even relevent to my post, just thought it was a good lead on into it.

On Wednesday night I dragged Paul along to watch my neice Chrissy (she's 12) and my nephew James (he's 9) perform in their school "Showbiz" concert thingy. And it was so worth it. They were awesome. Chrissy did a dance with about 6 other girls her age to Blame it on the Boogie by the Jackson 5. She was amazing! Some people when they dance concentrate hard and watch what the others are doing to keep in time but not Chrissy, she is so effortless and natural when it comes to dancing and I was so proud.

James was next and he was in the kapahaka. They did Poi-e (a maori song for all you people that don't know it) and then a wee haka thingy and he was so cool. He had a wee mohawk going on and got into it so much. I remember from my school kapahaka days and the boys never really got into it but James and the others were so good. They were doing it with all their passion and slapping their chests hard and it was brilliant.

Reuben (who's 3) obviously wasn't it in but I'll still post about him. Last sunday night I went to their house with Jeremy (he's over from Melbourne but going back today :( ) and Reuben was just so lovely. Late in the evening he gave Jeremy a big cuddle and goes "I love you more and more and more". We didn't tell him to say it he just did. And he's like that in loads of ways. Just so sweet and honest and cute. I am tempted to write all the cute things he did but I can imagine that most of you aren't that interested!! :) But he is lovely and wonderful. And if you want more stories just comment and I'll write them cos I'm the doting aunty who will talk about the kids for hours.

I'm so glad that they are my neices and nephews and I will never be able to say enough good things about them. It amazes me everytime I see them how cool they are and how much they love me and how much I love them. There's nothing quite like listening to them talking to me about anything or giving them hugs.

Dave and Deb: you did good. Thank heaps for them.

ps Deb did all the costumes for the concert and they were amazing, and Dave videoed it so it was quite the family event really!

Anyone remember watching Heartbeat??

It's been a while since I sat and read blogs, there's been so much work to do at tec and then having the last 4 days off. The main themes seem to be singleness, snow and politics.

Politics I'm over. Lets move on.

Snow was lovely to look at but very cold. I did however get 2 days off cos of it. Tec was closed on Monday and yesterday I woke up and decided one day just wasn't enough so I spent the day at home (apart from when we went out to do a few wee things we needed but I will talk about that later) with Paul just hanging out, playing on the net, cooking and relaxing. I had been so busy the last few weeks with my 50 million assignments and then the same again in exams it was nice to have time off and just hang out. I know next week is holidays but I'm working for the whole 2 weeks so its no holiday for me. One thing that I don't understand about the snow is that several people have said to me that it's not that much snow...hello people it's late September!! Any snow is a lot!

So our wee trip out of the house was funny though. Pauls phone get stolen on the weekend so we had to go report it to the police so that Vodafone could cancel it. So we went to the station near us which is Riccarton. Walking in the door we were wondered if we had stepped back in time. This old guy on the desk and posters on the wall advertising that from 1 January 1994 we had to always were helmets on bikes. We then spent 10 minutes trying to tell the guy that Pauls name isn't Steven at all. Not his last name, first name or middle name. It's not Steven. And as he sits there and says to us "I don't know where I got Steven from" he procedes to still write it down as Pauls middle name. Then the phone number was just as hard. 5321, 5231, 5321, 5321 no it's 5331!!! Finally we got to go to Vodafone and they tell us they need a case number so we went back to the Police Station from the 50s and there's another guy on the desk who is possibly 104 and he says to us "I'm sorry I'm not a police man so I can't help you" and all I can think is why is there an 104 year old man who is not a police man incharge of the police station???? Who knows.

Singleness apparently I can't comment on cos I'm not single. And lets be honest. What could I say that's any different from what everyone else says and thinks?

And for the record it is possible to marry too young and thousands of people do it everyday. The divorce rate for 18-25 year olds in NZ is 60%. Now try and tell me again that it's ok to get married early?

What would you do?

Recently on a couple of tv shows (Greys Anatomy and Home and Away) a couple have had to choose between the mother and the unborn child because she has cancer or a heart problem or something. If they keep the baby she dies and if she lives the baby will die. And I've heard of this scenario before. And I know it's just tv but I wondered what I'd do, and I talked to The Boy about what he would want to do if we were in that situation and so now I come to you, my fans, what would you do? Would you keep the unborn child and let you or your partner die or would you terminate the baby and have another child in the future when everything was better?

I love studying...

So much so that I'm blogging...instead of studying...it can wait. I have till Tuesday.

This story starts a week or two ago when we decided as a flat to clean out the freezer. We had no room so we took out everything that isn't ours and put that in a communial bag and then took out just as much ice. There's so much room now...anyhow back to the story! Buried in the ice we found a leg of lamb. Well we presumed lamb from the NZ Lamb stamp on the side. A nice big one that Si's mum had given him. So last sunday me and Moira cooked the best roast dinner. Think roast lamb, potatoes, parsnip, yams, carrots, pumpkin and kumara. With real gravy (Mum I managed to remember the recipe). Then apple crumble with custard and ice cream to finish. Was so good. But there was one thing...the lamb was a random pink colour. We decided it was smoked lamb. Was still good though a little strong tasting. Then the story gets interesting...Si's mum rings...he's like oh we had the roast lamb and it was awesome...her reply? "I gave you silverside...not lamb". Hmmm...that explains the colour! But still...was very nice!

Better study...actually I'm going to have lunch and then colour my hair and then go watch the rugby and maybe if I'm lucky I'll study after that.

Yesterdays Post...

Today I read Warwicks blog. He is someone who I have only met once or twice but I really like how he writes so I read his blog every day. Anyhow today he talked about how there's so much bad stuff but there is good stuff too (well that's what I got out of it) and it reminded me of the blog I was going to write yesterday. So here it is:

Things that made me smile:
1. The daffodils everywhere. The girl on the bus had one and there is loads in Hagley Park now. It reminds me of when I was little and I'd spend ages in the backyard with lego people creating them lives in the daffodils. Houses, families, lives. Was so much fun. I wish I could do it again but I wonder if I wouldn't be able to make them as interesting as when I was little! (Side thought: does realising the world isn't all good take away my creativity and ability to make up stories like I did when I was little?)

2. The guy behind me on the bus that was singing. You know, the guy who is listening on his walkman and singing along. This usual makes me laugh at them but this time I was glad he was doing it. He was happy and enjoying the music and he didn't care (or didn't know) that I could hear him. He was focused on something he was enjoying and not held down by bad stuff on the news or friends that aren't so good.

3. Walking through the atrium at tec I could smell that justmowedgrass smell. It has to be the best smell in the world. beats (only just) the smell of mums cooking. It never fails to make my day. Was even better that I was inside and as far as I could tell no doors were open. Not sure why. Just made it better. Maybe cos it means good things can get anywhere.

This is a fairly lame post. But like Warwick said...it's my blog and I'll do what I want!

I am disappointed

Today Brent Todd was named in relation to the drug trial up in Auckland. In his defence, he denies buying, selling or supplying drugs. And so I'm intrigued as to what he is going to be charged with. Possession maybe? I don't know.

But whatever it is I'm disappointed that it is him. I'm not sure exactly how old he is but he must be at least 40s. He's too old to do drugs. He's got kids. Parents shouldn't do drugs. He's a celebrity/sports stars so therefore a role model. Role models shouldn't do drugs.

And I understand that he's not just all those things. That he's a normal human being who probably just wants to have fun and so maybe his doing drugs is his fun but surely with all those things adding against him he should have known better.

As I write this I feel like some of my readers are going "yes Jo drugs are bad - what's the point in blogging about it" and all my other readers are going "get over it Jo it's just drugs - what's the point in blogging about it" but I am not writing this blog to please anyone. This is me just saying what I'm thinking as a way to reach a point for myself. And I'm writing it on this blog (as opposed to a journal which no one else would read) because I think it's important if you choose to be my friend that you know where I stand. Please understand that this isn't aimed at anyone it's just me writing.

So here's what I think about drugs: I wouldn't do them myself but I really don't care if one of my friends does them. I get the young people want to experiment. Until they reach a point. Until I think adulthood should really set in and they should realize it's just not cool. (I can hear the gasps now) Yes I think that as there is a minimum age for alcohol there is also a maximum age for drugs but it's just not as obvious.

And this age differs for people obviously. Like it's as young as 18 or 16 for some because that is when they become parents. I think when you become a parent you have to stop that kind of thing. But then there's those of us who don't have kids yet. So what's the age then? Personally (and here's where people will disagree with me) I think 30s. But I guess that's gonna differ for everyone. I think 30s you're definately an adult and there's nothing wrong with being an adult.

I don't know how to finish this blog. I don't know if I've got across my point. But maybe that doesn't matter. I hope this has all made sense.

I'm procrastinating...

Despite all my best laid plans, when I actually sit down to do my assignments I just can't be bothered. And so here I am blogging. About nothing exciting. Just blogging. Cos I can.

It seems the theme of this week is to join the gym or something similar. On 3 blogs currently (not quite currently cos Kate hasn't actually posted hers yet but I know its coming) the bloggers are joining the gym or becoming healthy (possibly there's a difference). And last night I had a long conversation about how me and Paul are gonna join the gym in a month or so, so that the 3 month membership will expire just before I go to Melbourne and at the start of Summer and we will both be attractive creatures. Well that's the plan. Maybe we should all have a competition. Maybe by 1 December we should be either at or well on our way to our goal weights. We all put in $10 and the person or people who are at the goal weights get to split the money. Could be incentive. Could be a waste of time.

Well what do we think? Shaz? Jase? Kate? Anyone else who's interested?

My flats under quarantine...

Well it's not really but maybe it should be. Maybe we should all be in isolation.

This morning I got up to find not 1, not 2 but 5 of my flatmates are sick. In the lounge was Chris, Janine, Derek, Si and Corey. And Paul was still in bed sick. And I know that's 6 people. I think Corey just had the day off. But just you wait...his time will come. Moira is just getting over this flu and that leaves me and Matilda that aren't sick. Well not yet. Lets hope we can avoid it!

And I think I got out of bed on the wrong side today. It's one of those days...am I the only one that has them? Everything annoys me. People annoy me. The weather annoys me. Being at tec annoys me. Having so much work to do annoys me. I just want to curl up under a rock and not be annoyed anymore. How good is bed going to be tonight.

Not my best post ever. But an honest one. I don't think I'm honest enough these days. Always trying to please other people. I will post again later to prove that I am not an unhappy girl but just not an always happy girl.

Guess Who's Back Guess Who's Back Guess Who's Back....

Ok it's just me. But it's been a while hey.

So I was thinking:

- What would happen if to be in the All Blacks you had to have white (Pakeha, NZ European, whatever you want to call it) in you?

- What if to go in Miss New Zealand you had to have white in you?

- What if to get a particular scholarship for Uni you had to have white in you?

Would people be upset? Would there be any objection?

60 Minutes or maybe a few less

The other night I watched 60 minutes with my flatmates. There was an article about muslims in New Zealand. There was a MP on the show who said that he thought that if the Koran said it it was right even when it said that homosexuals should be stoned to death. The next day every Tom Dick and Harry (and their dog) had a view on this including Helen. And so the MP took it back. Said he didn't really think that.

But so what if he does think that? I disagree of course. I don't think anyone should be stoned to death and definately not for their sexual preference. But cos I don't think the same as him should he change his view for me? Isn't it better that we have a parliament with varied points of view? Do I really want my country run by a group of people that all think the same and if someone disagrees they object and make them take it back?

"And just like the movies..."

On Monday night I watched Behind Enemy Lines. To me it's one of those movies that while I'm watching it I just know it's an awesome movie and that I love it. I've seen it maybe twice before but it's still just as good. I get the same feeling from Tears of the Sun, Van Helsing and Cold Mountain. And while I was watching the movie on Monday night I wondered what it is that I like about these movies cos when you see them they're all pretty violent and I don't like violent movies at all.

What I love about a movie is when you can feel the intensity of the scene with very little effort from the movie itself and you can't stop thinking about it afterwards. I'm not a fan of chick flicks or romantic comedys. Yeah they're nice and give you warm fuzzys but you don't think about them for days afterwards and continue to be amazed at what you feel from it.

In Behind Enemy Lines it's the scene where his commander can see him via satellite and they can see he's being chased and they see him fall and they can't understand why he's not being caught and then you see that he's lying in ditch with bodies. In Tears of the Sun it's the part where they find the village and there's ethnic cleansing. Van Helsing and Cold Mountain have similar scenes.

Signs is another movie that I could rave about for hours. The scene where they are outside and you can see a person just standing on the roof of one of their buildings. And how the director uses music or lack of music to get you to feel stuff in the movie.

So what makes a movie more than just a movie? For me it's not the happy ending, the graphics or the celebrities that are in it. It's that feeling that it's a really good movie. The ability of the movie to make me feel something intensely and not be able to forget about it. It's the movie that makes me want to see it again.

For Kate

And everyone else that misses me when I don't blog.

Tonight my Mum flies out to Melbourne to see my brother. You have no idea how much I want to get into her suitcase and go with her. But the excess backage charge would probably be more expensive then my just buying a ticket. And a lot less comfortable (Fly Emirates!!! They're awesome!). I really wish I was going. How good would it be to walk around those streets again. To not be as cold as I am here. To just hang out with Jeremy - having coffee, watching a band, eating breakfast somewhere, walking around St Kilda.

So really I think this blog should be called "For Jeremy". And maybe this blog will be about him and my getting to know him. Here goes:

When I was just a wee girl (I think 7 to be exact) my brother moved out of home. Not overwhelmingly exciting considering he is about 13 or 14 years older than me. And so for the next 12 years or so I didn't really see him much. Then when I was 19 I decided I wanted to go overseas for a wee bit and I went and lived with him in Melbourne. Possibly the most frightening thing I've ever done cos I was leaving everything I knew to live with a guy I didn't. But I am so glad I did. Jeremy is the loveliest man I know. If I could pick anyone to be my brother I'd always pick him. He's so talented and sweet and caring and funny. You have no idea how funny (and I'm not easily impressed - hey wow a blue car!!!). He's an ideas man, a bit political, a bit racial. Not too sure what sort he is. (I realise as I write this no one will understand but if he reads this he will).

I'm not really sure what else to write. Just that I miss him heaps and can't wait to see him again. And that I'm so glad I got to know him because my life would be so much less if I had just stayed in Christchurch and not spent time with him.

Second Attempt

I wrote this big blog or most of a blog about my trip to Dunedin on the weekend but it just wasn't doing it for me. It was so funny being there but when I try to explain it it feels like maybe you just had to be there, mind you, it's gonna be a great roundabout! (That's an example of just having to be there ok?)

And so I'll finish something I started a while back. When I talked about faith Andrew (I think it was Andrew) asked me to define or explain my faith. And the simple answer is that I can't. Because if I can explain it it's not faith in more. It's a proven fact. Faith to me is believing in something I can't prove but I just believe it is there. Example from a conversation I had this morning - some of you will recognise it from good old DCTalk - my faith in God is like the wind. I know the wind is there, I feel it and I see the effects of it but I can't actually see it.

There is something I will right about from the weekend and that was a car crash that me and Paul saw. Well heard is more accurate. We heard this crash and were like wonder what that was and then we saw people running so we went to the bridge and there was a car upside down in the water with someone inside. Was the strangest feeling watching these big men (roadworkers that had been across the road) in the river trying to open the door of the car and hearing their voices getting more and more panicked as they realised they couldn't get the door open and the guy inside wasn't moving. They did get him out and he was ok but for those few moments I couldn't handle the idea that I could be watching someones life ending. It was so intense and I was quiet for the rest of the day. Just shocked I guess. Lets not do that again!

Lastly has anyone else noticed that I only wrote once about flatting and yet this is called "Diary of a New Flatter"?

When good ankles go bad...

As Sharyn and Simona have managed to get the practise of Not-Studying-By-Blogging down to a fine art I feel that it is time I did the same. I'm not very good at it just yet but here goes...

I'm going to procrastinate by tell you a story about Priscilla. Now most of you know My Fountain of Rugby Knowledge but what you don't know about her is that she runs. Runs most days. Runs like 10kms a day. I think she's mad but she says she's training for a marathon so I have to be impressed. Anyways a couple of weeks back she sprained her ankle (I had to spell check ankle. It looks funny) when she was running. She had to limp back to her car in the dark. So for a week or so she limped around on her sprained ankle and went to the physio and all that but it still didn't get better. Then one day it swelled up to 3 times it's normal size. So being a little worried she went to the doctors...an afternoon at the doctors and an x-ray later she finds out that she hasn't actually sprained her ankle but broken it. Yip she'd walked around on it, ran on it a couple of times and biked on it (Yes she bikes too...something about a triathalon after the marathon) when it was not sprained but broken. So now she's on crutches but no plaster (she's been ripped off...broken limbs need plasters to look impressive). The marathon was last weekend and so she didn't get to go in it. So that's my story. She thought she'd sprained her ankle but actually it was broken. Didn't she do well!

Pete Murray - So Beautiful

Found myself just the other day

In the backyard of a friends place,

Thinkin' about you,

Thinkin' of the crowd you're in,

What you up too where you been?

(Just thinkin')

And all the clothes that you wear,

And the colors in your hair

Shouldn't change you

Now you tell me why it's so

You bigger than mighty Joe,

(At least you think so)

God my fingers burn,

Now when I think of touching your hair

You have changed so much that I don't know,

If I can call you and tell you I care

And I would love to bring you down,

Plant your feet back on the ground

Throw my smoke down on the ground,

Turn my head and I heard the sound,

(That reminded me)

Of the days so young and sweet

Always so much fun to meet

(At least I thought so)

Now you think your so damn fine

You can rule the world no not mine,

I don't think so

God my fingers burn,

Now when I think of touching your hair

You have changed so much that I don't know,

If I can call you and tell you I care

Now the scene that you're in,

And the people that you been with

Just get to me,

But you think I'm not as cool,

As you are so beautiful

Well who you fooling?

Well I'm here to tell you babe

The game your in is just a game

So damn pretentious

God my fingers burn,

Now when I think of touching your hair

You have changed so much that I don't know,

If I can call you and tell you I care

And I would love to bring you down,

Plant your feet back on the ground

You think you're so beautiful

(So beautiful)

This song always makes me think of someone I knew very well a while ago. It reminds me how he changed cos of who he was with. But then after that I wonder if that is what my friends think of me. I don't see lots of them much anymore. Do they think I've changed? Do they miss my being around? It's hard to write this without sounding like a depressed little girl. That's not how it is. Just sometimes I wonder who notices when I'm not around.

But despite the slightly sad reaction I have to this song it's also a brilliant song. Got to love Pete Murray. Makes me think of parties in Melbourne with Jem. Hot summer days in the backyard. Doesn't get much better than that.

When thoughts collide...

I had wondered what would happen in the next step of blogging and I think I have found it. Having more than one blog. Andrew has it. Now Sharyn and Iain. I briefly considered getting myself a second one and putting lyrics I like on it but then I thought again because the first song I would put on would be Don't Cha by The Pussycat Dolls (sing with me Paul and Kate..."don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me....").

Now I've never been a big fan of using the Favourites option in Internet Explorer but here at tec I have no option but to. Currently I have 16 blogs I read. There is just no way I could remember all those URLs! (oh no! using geeky tec terms!!). 16 blogs! That's quite a lot. That's 14 people I know that write on the internet. Actually there's more but I haven't added them all. It's handy having all these things to read though cos with the work I do (work...I use that term loosely) I spend a lot of time on the Internet.

Blog flavour of the week appears to be Cults, Male vs Female and Purau. Didn't go to Purau this time so have nothing really to say about that. Male vs Female: I don't think we're equals in everything. We are equals in how we should be treated but I accept that there's things they can do that I can't. Like fix cars and remember insane amounts of rugby and cricket facts (with the exception of Lilly who I like to call My Fountain Of Rugby Knowledge).

Cults: Until I was 9 my family was in one (I'm sure most of you know this by now from reading other blogs). I don't talk about it much. I'm not even sure if many of my friends know. There's one major difference between me and the rest of my family and that is that I don't remember anything bad from it. To me my childhood was normal and fun. I see the effects that this church had on my family but I don't feel them. I am well aware that if we had stayed in that environment I would be the opposite of who I am today but we didn't stay. Mum and Dad left. So I guess I shouldn't really be commenting on them if I don't have anything really to say about it but too bad. Maybe my point (if I actually have one) is that even though it was bad for so many people lots of good stuff came out of it too. Maybe it's the whole Beauty for Ashes thing. If you don't have the bad stuff you can't know how good the good stuff really is.

And sometimes I feel like people want me to feel pain from it but I can't. To me it's something that happened and it's shaped who I am and so I can't take it back or regret it. And I don't see the point in taking on pain that I don't feel.

Last subject change of the day: Murpheys Law for Friday - No matter how often you have a hair tie with you the day you really want it, it won't be on your wrist anymore!

Old Friends New Friends

I have to apologise in advance if this post is lame and incoherent. I'm tired ok?

This year my friendship group has changed considerably. At tec I found Nas and Kate who are so wonderful for me and to me. And through Kate I have met all my (wonderful) flatmates. I love the feeling of meeting new people and getting my faith in the human race restored by these people and their accepting of me for who I am but there's something bothering me at the same time. These people are so important to me but yet they don't know the other people in my life that are important. They don't know my family or my friends from school or even last year.

I don't really know how to write about this. I just don't understand how I can spend so much time with people and yet they don't know about the people that mean the most to me. Like Shaz and how awesome she sings, Jem and how just wonderful he is and how much I miss him and Deb and how creative she is. And Dave and how much of a brilliant business man he is. And that they haven't even met Chrissy, James and Ruby so don't get me started on them.

And it's not like I can just sit in the lounge with my flatmates and go "have I told you about my family?" cos it's not about telling them, it's about them knowing.

Have a little faith

I was asked on the weekend if I have ever questioned my faith. Was such a good question. My answer was no. My faith is something I have even when stuff is bad. It's a good times and bad times faith cos otherwise it's just something I do for fun or I use when I can't handle life.

Even though I could answer the question straight away I've thought about it since then. It's weird that this question is actually an answer to what I've been thinking about all year. This year my faith has changed considerably. It's no longer a totally outward thing. It's something I want to do on my own. It's no longer about going to church regularly so that people think I'm still a christian. It's not about staying with the rules and standards I've been bought up with. It's about making the choice to keep on believing even when I don't feel like it and I often feel like it's not the cool thing to do.

I guess this year is my time when I decide what to do with the faith my parents have brought me up in. Do I want to keep it or do I want to leave it behind and let it be something I did when I was young. And if I keep it how do I use it? Do I stay how it is or do I go with what I feel is the right way for me?

As I answered the question it is not an option for me to forget it. I can't and won't deny something that makes me who I am. But I will let it change for me. I think it's like music: it changes from generation to generation but yet the basics are the same. Neither is better than the other, they're just different interpretations.

5 Love Languages

Last night Kate asked me to write about this. Some of you will already know all this so I hope I get it right!

There is this marriage counsellor dude in the States who was getting lots of couples coming into his office with the same reasons for wanting to seperate. She would be like "when he comes home all he wants to do is fix the car and do the gardening and I just want him to come and talk to me" and he's like "she's always buying me stuff that I don't want or need and I just want her to sit down and watch tv with me". So he studied their reasons and what was going on for them and came up with the 5 Love Languages theory.

This theory says that there are 5 ways that people give and recieve "love". The way you give is usually different to the way you recieve. You can be one major one or a bit of a few. It can change for you as well. You probably won't always be the same "love language".

1. Acts of Service - This is things like mowing the lawns, doing the dishes, making cups of tea. This love language is where you do stuff for the person to show you love them.

2. Physical Touch - This is fairly obvious but also not really. It's not necessarily sex (cos this theory is for everyone not just couples). It's things like hugs and holding hands and stuff like that.

3. Gifts - This one is a hard one for people who have it cos it's easily misread. The gifts aren't about how much they cost. They are about seeing something and buying for the person it reminds them of. It's things like Random Present Day.

4. Quality Time - This is spending time together. It's that friend who gets annoyed cos you don't spend time with them. It's about hanging out and not necessarily doing anything exciting, just spending time together. Watching TV, having a coffee etc.

5. Words - This is where you say how you feel. Actually saying "I love you". Not an easy one to do unless you actually have this language.

This theory helped because it meant when you think someone doesn't really care or love you you can look at what they're doing and see they actually do they just show it differently.

And another one...

Because I am the best blogger ever...and cos Kate has one...now Nas has a blog.

www.movingonwithnas.blogspot.com

I know most of you don't know these girls but trust me they are the reason I go to tec. Tec would be so bad without them. Snaps for Kate and Nas!

Simply Squeezed Orange Juice

Have finally remember what I was planning to blog about this morning!

At 5am I woke up and all I wanted was juice. Simply Squeezed Orange Juice. Couldn't think of anything else and spend the next 2 hours trying to go back to sleep. Have now drunk 2 bottles today. That first bottle was so the best thing ever. Man my life is exciting!

Ladies and Gentleman!

We have a new blogger...my wonderful friend Kate has followed my example (for some reason she thinks I'm cool) and has her own blog. It is www.katedaly.blogspot.com .

And has anyone else noticed that the blogging has slowed down? What's with people blogging only every few days now! What else am I supposed to do during work and classes? And don't say work cos that's just ridiculous.

I actually have nothing interesting to write so will have a think and continue this later.

Website of the Week

More than just a week cos it's awesome. New ones every day!!

www.crickler.com/crickler.html

I recommend doing the Crossword one and the Vocab one cos the news one is not so easy for us kiwis.

I can't be bothered explaining it so you can read the help section for how to do it.

Mum and Dad

I still don't know if I will write about yesterday so while I think about it I will write about why I wouldn't want anyone else to be my Mum and Dad (in no particular order).

1. When the civil union bill came out you let me talk about how I felt about it and you restored my faith in christians by agreeing with me.

2. When it comes to boys you let me choose and you support me and believe in me.

3. You like my piercings. Is like too strong? You support my choice to have them.

4. You like how I dress. Is like too strong again? When I wear 3/4s and heels you think I look lovely even though it's very fashionable and parents aren't meant to like the latest fashions!

5. When we talked about abortion recently I nearly cried because of how wonderful you were to listen to me and again support my views. It was amazing to me that you said you would support me no matter what choices I make in life. Especially in this area where I honestly believe if I had one I would lose 95% of my friends. That you would still be there and love me and even understand it is more than I can believe.

6. Mum: Yesterday when I rang you crying you listened to me for so long and that you wanted me to come home for the night.

7. You read my blogs and comment on them.

8. Dad: You offer to send out Tony Soprano for me.

9. You are supportive of me in my choice to not always attend church. You let me make the choice to have and to work on my internal faith instead of trying to get me to have an external faith.

10. Dad: You steal my cds because you like listening to them (not because you don't want me to play them anymore!!)

There's so much more but I think that will do for now. Don't let it go to your heads mum and dad. Just thought I should say why you are so cool.

I have a dream...

Actually I had a dream. A while ago. But I'll go into that soon.

My delay at blogging has not been because I am not doing it. It's cos I'm very busy and important (Sharyn!!!). No honestly I am. Yesterday day I completed not 1, not 2 but 3 (!!!) assignments. Such a good feeling. Part of doing that also meant I finished a class. No more IG600 for Jo! Didn't I do well!!! (Thanks Bruce Forsythe for that very appropriate saying).

So this dream. It was really funny and yet painfully sad at the same time. For days afterwards I cried. Cried when I thought about it. Cried when I tried to explain it to mum. I'm such a girl sometimes!

The Funny Part: Heaven is a shopping mall. Yip no gold paths, no angels in big dress playing harps. It's a shopping mall. With a hairdressers and crappy elevator music playing.

The Sad Side: I was going there and had to say goodbye to everyone.

So in this dream I find out that I have 5 minutes before I die. Not die but leave this earth and go to heaven. Before that 5 minutes start I can go to this place and see what it's like. And Lilly can come with me to see it. So we walk through these sliding doors and it's a mall. A shopping mall. And it's not too cold or too hot so we decide it's heaven and not hell. Good news is I'm going to heaven and it's a shopping mall.

But then I have to leave and come back and say goodbye. All I know is I have to ring Mum & Dad and Jared. I figure Mum & Dad can say my goodbyes for me and I have to ring Jared to explain it to him so he'll understand why I'm leaving/dying. And Lil. I have to say goodbye to her. And I'm happy that she's there cos there's no one else I want to spend my last 5 minutes with.

We're walking along (and this is the part that makes me cry) and the only thing I can say to her is "I am so honored that you chose to be my friend in this life". Even now I can feel how deeply I felt that it is such an honor that she picked me to be her best friend. That she chose me to spend the first 21 years with.

I'm not sure if I've got my point across. It's hard to write how vivid that dream was.

Blogging

What is the point of blogging? What's the point of having people comment on my blogs?

Recently blogging has become the in thing. For a while before that I had been considering getting one just so I could write the stuff I feel somewhere other than a journal. I wasn't going to tell anyone I know about it cos that isn't the point of blogging to me but then I moved out of home and I figured my family and friends might like to keep up with where I'm at.

So I have my blog and I have allowed other people to view it. But what about the comments thing. Are they there so people can say what they think or so they can agree or disagree or are they there for no reason? And if people have the ability to comment on my blog should I take it personally or just as their views?

I really don't know the answers to these questions. I write what I feel or whatever and if people comment and they are rude or harsh about it (yes paul I'm talking about you) I take it personally. I don't expect people to agree with me. By now I have learnt that how I feel is almost always different from everyone else. But I do expect there to be some respect for how I feel.

If what I feel offends people then I won't blog. There's no point to it and you have missed my point.

Good things so far about flatting

1. My flatmates are lovely. I can talk to them and they can talk to me. They don't mind that I'm "religious" and they let me moan when I'm sick. Also they're gutted when I can't go do something with them.

2. I can eat if and when I want. (I do miss your cooking mum) but it's also fun to cook for myself. Made the worlds BEST indian the other night. Chicken and Pumpkin Masala. Was so good I even had the left overs for lunch the next day.

3. Wednesday night is pizza night - Pizza Hut 2 slabs for $10.

4. My neighbours. Ok one imparticular. He goes to tec as well but he's a rec student so me and Kate immediately get cool status. Think 3rd form at school and a 7th former talks to you. He asked me this morning "how's life on the other side of the fence". Got to love thy neighbours!!!

5. We have a grandstand. If you don't know what I mean think a row of couches with a row behind of desks and then couches on top of those desks. Can't visualise it? Just know that it's cool.

6. Every night is like going to a party. There's 8-10 of us most nights and trust me this isn't a bad thing.

7. Watching Home and Away with the boys. Yes the boys. They like it more then us girls!

8. Dereks brownies....think hot perfect chocolate cake with m&ms. Trust me it's heaven!!!

9. Getting my nails done for free by an award winning nail technician. Yes that's right. (Raewyn won Nail Technician of the Year last night. Very exciting.)

I think that's enough for now...to be continued I'm sure!

Rainy Mondays

It's monday. I am sick. Missed class this morning cos I thought sleeping was more important. I did however wake up at 5am and didn't get back to sleep till 6.30am. Not a complete waste of time. I watched a gardening program and learnt all about the 4 ways of growing grass. hmmm...my life is too exciting. oh and I watched the news and attempted to watch Benny Hinn. Attempted. He's too much for me at 5.30am!!

Can I just say I love my flatmates? they're so lovely too me. They think I'm awesome too... Just give them time! They'll soon learn the truth! Some quotes from them:

"I can tell you anything cos you're so honest"
"It's not a party without you"
"You're the bomb"

Better do some class work...

Trading Spouses

This is quite full on for my first blog but it has to be said. I have to say it.

I watched this program last night. Not too sure why I did. I think it was cos I didn't want to go to sleep but also didn't want to watch 20/20.

Last night's episode was a jewish woman swapping with a christian woman. seems easy enough. but this christian woman. man she annoyed me. she sat the kids (teenage girls) down and got a chocolate bar and did the sex talk with them. "Each person you sleep with is like taking a bite out of this bar. If you sleep with lots of people when it gets to your husband you've got nothing left to give him". But that's so wrong! What's she actually teaching these girls? that all we have to give to our husbands is sex. That if I sleep with someone and then when it comes to marrying someone else I have nothing to give him. that's rubbish. I'm a cool person! I have lots to give. I'm funny and cool and creative and I like who I am. Just ask my mum. I'm cool. He's lucky to have me choose him (and only him) to love for the rest of my life. Just cos I may have loved someone else before him doesn't mean I have nothing left to give him. There is so much more to me and what I have to give to a marraige then sex.

Am I wrong here? Am I overreacting? yes most likely but it had to be said.

For my mum

So mum this is for you. A blog as you requested.

But it's also for everyone else that I never see anymore. It's my fault I know. Shouldn't have moved so out of everyones way. But now you can read what I'm doing/thinking.

Welcome to my world.